Mother’s Day arrives on May 11, 2014, and amid all the stress of planning the perfect brunch and buying the right gifts, we felt it was time to remember the lighter side of being a parent.
Here are some of the funniest quotes about mothers around. If you got your fantastic sense of humour from your mom, you know she’d appreciate them too:
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David And Victoria Beckham
He’s one of the world’s richest athletes and her nickname is Posh Spice – so it’s no surprise the Beckhams once gifted their mothers $46,000 Audis Q3s for Mother’s Day.
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Get Mom Racing
Not everyone can bend it like Beckham and spring for an Audi for mom though. However, giving her the chance to race her dream sports car around a track (for approximately $60 a lap) at a href=”http://gtaexotics.ca/dev/” target=”_hplink”a place like GTA Exotics/a might be the next best thing.
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Ivanka Trump
The Donald’s little girl is all grown up now and is a successful businesswoman in her own right. When Ivanka was recently asked by Gilt.com what gifts she’d like to recieve for Mother’s Day from her kids, she a href=”http://www.gilt.com/sale/women/picks-for-ivanka-trump” target=”_hplink”picked a Versace pillow and Chanel handbag/a, among other luxury items. It must be easier finding a gift for The Donald on Father’s Day: Hair products.
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Ivanka Trump’s Mother’s Day Pick
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Dwayne Wade
Basketball superstar Dwayne Wade was blessed with God-given athletic talent. His mom, Jolinda Wade, is a church pastor. So it seems fitting that he bought her a church, called the Temple of Praise.
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Temple Of Praise
The gesture has great significance, considering Mother Wade was once a fugitive and drug dealer before finding God and starting her ministry while doing time in state prison.
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Justin Bieber: The Gift Of Music
When you are a multi-million dollar, multi-platinum recording artist, a homemade Mother’s Day card isn’t going to cut it. However, a homemade song sounds about right. A couple of years ago, Justin Bieber released a song dedicated to his mom called “Turn To You”. To top it off, all proceeds of the song’s sales went towards the Bethesda Centre, an Ontario-based women’s shelter that helped Bieber’s mom while she was pregnant with him back in the day. Unfortunately, a href=”http://www.lfpress.com/2013/05/30/londons-bethesda-centre-for-unwed-mothers-once-home-to-justin-bieber-and-his-mother-patti-mallette-listed-for-sale-at-175m” target=”_hplink”the Centre closed in 2012/a.
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Robert Downey Jr.: Iron Man Shops Upscale
Iron Man was spotted shopping for a Mother’s Day gift for his wife at trendy Tory Burch last year. Fortunately, you don’t have to be a rich superhero like Tony Stark to shop at Tory Burch.
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Tory Burch For Mom
There are stores across Canada and Mother’s Day sales on now on a variety of items – including this a href=”http://www.toryburch.com/ella-cork-mini-tote/21149663.html?dwvar_21149663_color=276start=50cgid=clothing-mothers-day” target=”_hplink”stylish Ella Cork Mini Tote/a.
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Leonardo DiCaprio: The Ultimate Garden Gift Set
The Wolf of Wall Street is also the king of the forest when it comes to being an environmental crusader. So it was fitting when DiCaprio a href=”http://www.treepeople.org/leonardo-dicaprio-dedicates-tree-mother%E2%80%99s-day” target=”_hplink”dedicated a grove of trees in southern California/a to honour his mother and grandmother last Mother’s Day. “Planting trees is a great way to say thank you to the mothers in our lives,” said DiCaprio.
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Mariah Carey: Carried Away With The Bling
When Mariah Carey had her twin babies, Monroe and Moroccan, she celebrated her first Mother’s Day with a 4-carat diamond/sapphire custom necklace from hubby Nick Cannon. The sparkling piece, which also incorporates 14-karat white and rose gold, was valued at $12,000.
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Ryan Reynolds: Photo-Genetics
Ryan Reynolds makes his living on film but he prefers to get behind the camera when it comes to Mother’s Day gifts. The actor becomes a photographer in order to personalize his gift to mom. “I usually every year a href=”http://usatoday30.usatoday.com/life/people/2009-05-05-celebs-mothers-day_N.htm?csp=34″ target=”_hplink”make a photo album for them of the year’s events/a. It’s those personal gifts that really set my parents on fire,” explained Reynolds to USA Today. “Or I may just give them my therapy bill.”
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Ben Affleck: Public Displays Of Admiration
The newest Batman actor celebrated Mother’s Day on the Huffington Post with a href=”http://www.huffingtonpost.com/ben-affleck/happy-mothers-day_b_1512132.html” target=”_hplink”a touching video tribute dedicated to his wife Jennifer Garner, his mom, and mothers all over the world/a.
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Actor-writers Ben Affleck (2nd left) and Matt Damo
“I want to say Happy Mother’s Day to all the moms in my life–my mom, Chris, and my amazing wife, Jennifer, who is an incredible, spectacular, world-class mom, and I want to thank her,” Affleck said in the video. The video, which was shot during Affleck’s trip to the Democratic Republic of Congo a couple of years ago, also featured footage of moms and children in the Congo.
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LeBron James: More Than Words
Two-time NBA champion LeBron James once gave his mom a Porsche for her birthday. However, a href=”http://shriverreport.org/americas-working-single-mothers-an-appreciation-lebron-james/” target=”_hplink”his essay about his mom for The Shriver Report/a, a nonprofit media project helmed by NBC News correspondent Maria Shriver, might be considered one of the most touching gifts a mother could ask for. The first-person piece featured James writing about “trying to help single mothers who are struggling to make a living and raise their kids, because that perfectly describes my mother when I was growing up.”
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NEXT: Mother’s Day Gifts She Won’t Buy For Herself
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A Silent Juicer
Meet your mom’s new main squeeze. This juicer will help Mom create everything from her funky green smoothies to a pulp-filled OJ.
a href=”http://www.bestbuy.ca/en-CA/product/kuvings-kuvings-silent-juicer-940sc-burgundy-940sc/10287905.aspx?path=7e5f00e7e1f702911bca9951891b36f7en02″ target=”_blank”Kuvings Silent Juicer, $380, available at Best Buy/a
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Sleep Tracker
Mom may have been up to the wee hours of the night when you were a teenager, but these days she could use some tracking in the sleep department. This wristband tracks steps, distance, and calories burned during the day, and monitors snooze time.
a href=”http://www.microsoftstore.com/store/msca/en_CA/pdp/Fitbit-Flex-Wireless-Activity-and-Sleep-Wristband/productID.286282900″
target=”_blank”Sleep Wristband, $100, available at the Microsoft Store /a -
The Little Details
If your mom loves to garden, she is probably spending time buying bigger plants or veggies. Sometimes, the cute potters and flowers are out of her radar/on her wish list, so surprise her with these jars!
a href=”http://www.etsy.com/ca/listing/105571109/mason-jar-wall-planter-organizer-decor?ref=fp_treasury_11″ target=”_blank”Mason Jar Wall Planter, $34, available on Etsy /a
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Parachute Hammock
Seriously, your mom would never buy this and would probably yell at you for spending the money. But this gift is something both her and your dad (and you) can enjoy.
a href=”http://www.overstock.com/Sports-Toys/Parachute-Silk-Waterproof-Two-person-Hammock-with-Stuff-Sack/4835102/product.html?refccid=ROE72UC3YQVYBSCJXYCOJND7QUsearchidx=9″ target=”_blank”Parachute Silk Waterproof Two-person Hammock, $57, available on Overstock.com /a
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A Super Useful Phone
Mom may still be using her flip-phone to call you at odd hours and send you texts. Revamp her gadget with a new smartphone, equipped with a high-quality camera (for selfies, of course) and a built-in bookshelf.
a href=”http://www.google.ca/nexus/5/” target=”_blank”Nexus 5, available at the Google Star, $349 /a
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Massage Cushion
Your mom deserves a break. Treat her (and her back) with this Swedish Shiatsu massage she can use in her car or at work.
a href=”http://www.bestbuy.ca/en-CA/product/obusforme-obusforme-shiatsu-massage-cushion-sm-smc-04-brown-sm-smc-04/10218403.aspx?path=26f8a7165b18e8187da00cd711ab6caaen02″ target=”_blank”Obusforme Shiatsu Massage Cushion, $60, available at Best Buy /a
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A Personalized Cutting Board
Your mom may already have a few cutting boards in her kitchen, but we bet you she has NOTHING like this personalized one.
a href=”http://www.etsy.com/ca/listing/181965500/mothers-day-present-custom-cutting-board?ref=br_feed_8br_feed_tlp=mothers-day-gifts” target=”_blank”Mother’s Day Present Custom Cutting Board, $51, available on Etsy /a
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Fancy (And Scented) Bath Products
Your mom may not be up for buying herself a massage or spa package. To make things a little different this year, try a head-to-toe bath and body set from LUSH — this way she can experience some down time at home.
a href=”http://www.lush.ca/on/demandware.store/Sites-LushCA-Site/en_CA/Page-View?cid=mothersday-landingpage-2014″ target=”_blank”Mum Gift, $54, available at LUSH/a
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‘Friends’ DVD Set
Let your mom relive her favourite moments form “Friends” over and over again. This gift set includes all episodes from the 10 years of the series!
a href=”http://www.amazon.ca/Friends-Complete-Series-Jennifer-Anniston/dp/B00B1LN8WY/ref=br_lf_m_1002406161_1_7_ttl?ie=UTF8s=dvdpf_rd_p=1778889382pf_rd_s=center-3pf_rd_t=1401pf_rd_i=1002406161pf_rd_m=A3DWYIK6Y9EEQBpf_rd_r=0N218S4H5JMFTX499C15″ target=”_blank”Friends Complete Series, $145, available on Amazon.ca /a
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Shake It Like A Polaroid Picture
Mom may get all shy and red if you give her a Polaroid camera, but just think about how much fun she’ll have taking pictures of her everyday adventures. Instantly.
a href=”http://www.urbanoutfitters.com/urban/catalog/productdetail.jsp?id=26521526parentid=A-GIFTS” target=”_blank”Impossible Polaroid One-Step Close-Up Camera, $180, available at Urban Outfitters /a
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Magnetic Knife Holder
Mom always taught you one thing: Never run around with sharp objects. At least this way, she can keep her favourite (and expensive) knives in a safe place.
a href=”http://www.etsy.com/ca/listing/129989754/knife-rack-magnetic-rack-reclaimed?ref=br_feed_60br_feed_tlp=mothers-day-gifts” target=”_blank”Knife Rack, $44, available on Etsy /a
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An Ice Cream Maker
Mom will definitely feel like a kid again when she can make her own scoops of ice cream with sprinkles.
a href=”http://www.overstock.com/Home-Garden/Cuisinart-ICE-45-Mix-it-in-Soft-Serve-1.5-quart-Ice-Cream-Maker/5738115/product.html?refccid=TTYESWG7HDOK24SDOKME3QINBIsearchidx=11″ target=”_blank”Cuisinart ICE-45 Mix-it-in Soft Serve 1.5-quart Ice Cream Maker, $121, available on Overstock.com /a
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Books That She Loved
Add to your mom’s bookshelf by giving her a box-set of books she might have read growing up as a kid. This Alice Munro box-set includes five classics.
a href=”http://www.chapters.indigo.ca/books/alice-munro-collection/9780143191438-item.html?ref=by-shop%3aseasonal%3amday-books-fic%3abooks-irresistible-fiction%3a1%3a” target=”_blank”The Alice Munro Collection, $27, available at Chapter’s/Indigo/a
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Family Photo Shoot
Mom would never think to impose on the family for some new pictures, but you know she’d love them. Best of all, with a gift card to this service, she can pick a photographer she loves — and of course, the timing too. (There are plenty of other services to choose from too.)
a href=”http://www.begift.com/” target=”_blank”Begift gift cards, starting from $25, begift.com/a.
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DIY Guitar
Let your mom be a kid again with this super fun DIY guitar set. And if she was a keen guitarist back in her university or college days (or still is), this gesture will go a long way.
a href=”http://www.urbanoutfitters.com/urban/catalog/productdetail.jsp?id=32228983parentid=A-GIFTS” target=”_blank”DIY Build Your Own Ukulele Kit, $40, available at Urban Outfitters /a
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The Perfect Yoga Bag
She may already have the yoga mat, but never got time to get herself a yoga bag. And if she’s all about being eco-friendly, she’ll appreciate the fact this bag was made from water-resistant recycled poly, reclaimed from plastic bottles.
a href=”http://www.amazon.ca/YogaRat-Matpak-Durable-Versatile-Ember/dp/B00A6WZ228/ref=br_lf_m_1002406171_1_26_ttl?ie=UTF8s=sportspf_rd_p=1777071862pf_rd_s=center-3pf_rd_t=1401pf_rd_i=1002406171pf_rd_m=A3DWYIK6Y9EEQBpf_rd_r=03F0GR1110BQMC3A43Z6″ target=”_blank”YogaRat Matpak Yoga Bag, $32, available on Amazon.ca /a
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A Cool Fan
Her workplace or home office gets so warm in the summer, but you’ll never hear her complaining. Make sure she’s comfortable all year long with a fan that is not only silent, but looks like a piece of art for her desk.
a href=”http://www.dysoncanada.ca/en-CA/fansandheaters/fans/desk/am06-30-range/am06-desk-fan-30-black-nickel” target=”_blank”Dyson Desk Fan, $349.99. dyson.ca/a.
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Whimsical Decor
Updating her decor is a dream, but she never seems to find the time to go shopping for it — and when she does, she never finds what she likes. Give her a helping hand with gorgeous throw pillows to start.
a href=”http://www.anthropologie.com/anthro/product/home-pillows/28250686.jsp?cm_sp=Grid-_-28250686-_-Regular_33″ target=”_blank”Firenze Velvet Tassel Pillow, $58-$78, Anthropologie/a.
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Classic Cover
Perhaps your mom has a cottage that has been crying out for a Point Blanket for years (but she’s been making do with an old throw), or a white couch that this would look lovely draped over. Either way, it’s time for her to enjoy the stripes.
a href=”http://www.thebay.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/en/thebay/hbc-/blankets/multistripe-point-blanket-0012-1019553–24″ target=”_blank”Hudson’s Bay Company Multi-Stripe Point Blanket, $395, The Bay/a.
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Luxe Pajamas
Mom may not be the type to hang around in her pajamas much later than 7 a.m., but if anything can convince her, it’s this super-soft, adorably printed nightie and robe.
a href=”http://www.holtrenfrew.com/” target=”_blank”Oscar de la Renta chemise ($170) and knit robe ($190), Holt Renfrew/a.
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Heavy Metal
Your mom’s been using the same old slow cooker since she got married, and while she swears it’s the only one she’ll ever want, we’re guessing an option that has ergonomic handles and pouring functionality will be even more beloved.
a href=”http://www.williams-sonoma.com/products/all-clad-d7-slow-cooker/” target=”_blank”All-Clad d7 Slow Cooker, from $300, Wiliams-Sonoma/a.
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Rain Coverage
It’s time for Mom to throw out that tiny travel umbrella with the bent spokes and step up to the big time with a designer name, wooden handle and massive canopy.
a href=”http://www.raindropsto.com/jean-paul-gaultier-faux-leather-umbrella” target=”_blank”Jean Paul Gaultier Faux Leather Umbrella, $260, Raindrops/a.
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Wet And Wild
Is a garden hose the most luxurious gift for Mother’s Day? No — but if Mom loves her garden, it could be the best one. This hose promises not to kink, and comes in a variety of eye-popping hues.
a href=”http://www.homedepot.ca/product/premium-rubber-hose/869288″ target=”_blank”Colourwave Premium Rubber Hose, $130, Home Depot/a.
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One Extra Bag
If Mom gets worried about having enough room in her suitcase for any, um, additional purchases when she travels, ease her mind by making sure she packs along a foldable, durable, adorable bag.
a href=”http://www.amazon.ca/Tumi-014829D-Luggage-Just-Black/dp/B003FKQTR0/ref=sr_1_42?s=luggageie=UTF8qid=1399065349sr=1-42keywords=Tumi” target=”_blank”Tumi 014829D Luggage Just In Case Tote, $105, Amazon.ca/a.
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Park Day!
Give Mom an amazing excuse to find time for a picnic — a blanket that begs to be shown off (even if it’s just to her and her friends). For her practical side, let her know this one’s machine washable and waterproof on one side.
a href=”http://www.artsymodern.com/collections/outdoor/products/pre-order-anorak-kissing-horses-picnic-blanket” target=”_blank”Anorak Kissing Horses Picnic Blanket, $62, Artsy Modern/a.
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Wake Up Right
Proper sleep is just as important (or more so!) for Mom as everyone else. Help make sure she starts her day gently with this light that simulates sunrise (because we’re hoping she’s not waking at 6 every day).
a href=”http://www.amazon.ca/Philips-Canada-Vitalight-Wake-Up-1-Count/dp/B00E91EGDS/ref=br_lf_m_1002406201_1_1_ttl?ie=UTF8s=hpcpf_rd_p=1778613302pf_rd_s=center-3pf_rd_t=1401pf_rd_i=1002406201pf_rd_m=A3DWYIK6Y9EEQBpf_rd_r=14P1FZS303NV0TNKQMRD” target=”_blank”Philips Canada Vitalight Wake-Up Light, $70, Amazon.ca/a.
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NEXT: 20 Gifts For Mom Under $20
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For The Mom Who ‘Likes’ Everything You Do
If your mom is going to follow you on Facebook and Instagram on her laptop, she might as well look good while cybersmothering you. This compact laptop sleeve looks like a stylish clutch purse and also provides padded and water-resistant protection. The attractive design might even encourage your mom to post a photo of your gift on her Facebook timeline under the heading: “Best Mother’s Day ever!”
a href=”http://www.microsoftstore.com/store/msusa/en_US/pdp/Greene-+-Gray-13-Inch-Laptop-Sleeve-BlackFloral/productID.285652800″ target=”_blank”Microsoft Laptop Sleeve, $19.97/a
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For The Earth Loving Mom
Buying cleaning products for Mother’s Day is a risky move that only Dad would dare try. But if your mom is all about mother nature and protecting the environment,she emmight/em appreciate some natural cleaning products. Still, you better get Mom some flowers to go along with this gift idea, or at least offer to clean the house for a month.
a href=”http://www.cleanattitude.com/fruit_vegetable_wash_p/10780.htm” target=”_blank”ATTITUDE cleaning products, $2.99 to $10.99/a
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For The Active Mom
This isn’t your mother’s ordinary water bottle that she carries around during workouts or jogs. The Rejuvenate Hydration is on another level: It has a long slotted tube that holds fruit slices to subtly flavour the water. The silicone pulp guard underneath the lid minimizes pulp intake. The flip top lid is also leak proof.
a href=”http://www.trudeaucorp.com/ca-en/products/hydration/capacity/17-oz/p-rejuvenate-08713200.html” target=”_blank”Rejuvenate Hydration Bottle, $15.50/a
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For The Connected Mom
Moms that like to accessorize will appreciate Acoustic Research’s new line of pretty tech accessories, each designed with input from more than 1,000 women. In particular, the bright and colourful charging cables for micro USB and 30-Pin add a designer’s touch to everyday tech accessories.
a href=”www.ARforher.com” target=”_blank”Acoustic Research for Her: Charging Cables, $11.99/a
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For The Mom On The Go
Your mom will appreciate the Bracketron if she runs. The lightweight gadget will make it easier for her to carry her smartphone and other essentials while working out. It also features an easy-to-see, built-in reflector so passing drivers and cyclists can easily spot your mom, especially if she’s one of those urban runners unwilling to break their stride for stoplights and crosswalks.
a href=”www.bracketron.com” target=”_blank”Bracketron TruRunner, $19.95/a
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For The Mom Who Likes To Jam
Your mom will be the talk of her tea party when she pulls out her pocket-sized mini speaker to provide some mood music. The lightweight, rechargeable mini speaker has a 360-degree sound design and features a built-in audio cable which folds to store directly into the bottom of the speaker. It also has an enhanced bass resonator, just in case your mom feels like cranking it up when any Dr.Dre or Snoop Dog songs come up on her playlist.
a href=”www.kinivo.com” target=”_blank”Kinivo: ZX100 Mini Portable Speaker, $19.95/a
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For The Flower Lover
Almost everyone is going to get their mom flowers for Mother’s Day. You can take an extra step by getting your mom flowers… in a designer vase. The heart-shaped Bud Vase has cylinder glass tubes that can slide out for easy cleaning.
a href=”http://www.overstock.com/Home-Garden/Swetheart-Iron-Heart-shaped-Bud-Vase/6309072/product.html?refccid=KOCC4NUT6MSZMNSGJGFBX74YYMsearchidx=84″ target=”_blank”Sweetheart Iron Heart-shaped Bud Vase, $16.78/a
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For The Mom Who Loves Fashion (But Doesn’t Like To Spend)
The Kollar Clothing Toque is perfect for the mom that frets about buying department store fashions because she doesn’t want to look like everyone else. Kollar Clothing is a boutique line that was started by young Toronto fashion designer David Kollar. The toque itself is light enough that it can be used to complement outfits for early spring.
a href=”www.kollarclothing.com” target=”_blank”Kollar Clothing Toque, $20/a
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Article source: http://www.huffingtonpost.ca/2014/05/06/funny-mothers-day-quotes-2014_n_5270765.html